Fraggle Rock is good medicine. And I needed some good medicine the other day.
I was burnt out by covering the work shifts of sick millennials and worrying over finances and responsibilities.
I was discouraged by the recent resignation I tendered at a group I attend. I had taken up a position of service without fully considering whether or not I was ready to give so much of myself so soon. I joined the group about four months ago and when a fellow member nominated me for the position I, as usual, felt I couldn’t say no. I admire this member and wanted to gain her approval.
Being a people pleaser and a yes-woman are reasons why I joined the group in the first place. It is an organization that encourages recovery from such behavior and fosters self care as a new priority and ideal. The agony I felt after my first few days in the new role has been an undeniable lesson in breaking my old habits.
I left our weekly meet-up feeling like a failure and a disappointment. Even though I knew that I was doing something important for myself. Even though I knew my choice to step down was healthy, while my original acceptance of the nomination was not.
I came home in tears and decided to make macaroni salad.
Guys, I am obsessed with macaroni salad. It’s mah new thang y’all. I make it at least three times a week for dinner and I think I’ve gained weight as a result of my infatuation.
You see, I like to prepare it using mayonnaise, which I thought was a relatively harmless condiment. God bless Canada for teaching me to dip my fries in it. Or goddamn them, because I recently read the nutritional information on the label and low and behold, ALL of the calories are derived from fat!! How could Hellman’s (or Best Foods depending on where you live) betray me like this?!? (Tiny lie there. I, of course, get my mayo from Trader Joe.)
Anyway, I took my macaroni and settled in to hopefully start reading Anne’s House of Dreams, the fifth book in the Anne of Green Gables series. Blast and wretch, it was unavailable by way of the public library’s e book collection. I had to submit a hold.
BTW, if you’ve a Kindle or other e reader handy, check out your local library’s web site to see if they offer digital loans. This discovery has changed my life for the better and I bless the LAPL for their generosity and hard work.
I puttered around the library’s website, trying to find some other spirit-soothing entertainment to go along with my pasta. I was surprised and encouraged to find you can also rent videos on their website (LIBRARIES ARE AMAZE!!).
And that’s where I found Fraggle Rock.
Watching it was like manna to a parched soul. Or like coming comfortably home. It’s been so calming in a slightly spooky way. You see, I watched the series when it first aired back in 1983. So I was two years old (stop your math-doing right now). I am remembering a two-year-old’s feelings and emotions with specific clarity and it’s the closest I can get to time travel without Doc and Marty.
For instance, I remembered clearly the hurt and outrage little Amanda felt when Boober whispered “Down at Fraggle Rock” at the end of the opening theme song, instead of his usual sarcasm-filled utterance of the same. Toddler me was DONE with this show if they didn’t go back to the old way by the next episode (they did).
And yo, it’s a REALLY good show. The lessons it imparts are woven subtly and without sentiment. And certainly without banging you over the head or shoveling ideals at you.
And the jam bandy music! I think it’s why I love Phish songs to this day and why they resonated with such familiarity upon first listen.
Mokey is still my fave.
Although I sometimes get impatiently mad at her. Like I do with myself.